My wife and I have the secret to making the marriage last...
Twice a week we go to a nice restaurant,
have some good food,
a little wine and companionship.
She goes Tuesday and I go Friday.
We sleep in separate beds,
hers in Sydney and mine in Melbourne.
I take my wife everywhere,
but she keeps finding her way back.
I asked her where she wanted to go for our anniversary,
'Somewhere I haven't been for a long time' she said.
So I suggested the kitchen.
We always hold hands.
If I let go, she shops.
She has an electric blender,
an electric toaster and an electric bread maker.
When she said that she had too many gadgets but nowhere to sit down.
I bought her an electric chair.
Remember that marriage is the number one cause of divorce.
Statistically 100% of all divorces started with marriage.
I married Ms. Right, I just didn't know that her first name was ALWAYS.